Bryan Altman, CBS Local Sports
Sports and movies have a lot in common. The storylines for the two often stay somewhat similar throughout the years while the characters and athletes that play them out change. And of course in both, there have to be heroes and there have to be a villains.
We have certainly not lacked for sports villains over the last few years and obviously, the silver screen has had its fair share of notable villains as well.
When Lance Armstrong claimed he’s “Cycling’s Lord Voldemort,” referring to the villain from the Harry Potter franchise, it felt like an opportunity to match up some more sports villains with their movie counterparts. Here are some sports villains and the silver screen villains that they best match up with.
1. Bill Belichick – Darth Sidious (Star Wars)
This one is what we would call “low hanging fruit.” The hoodie, the mystique, and the stoic manner in which each dispatches their respective rivals makes this one a layup.
2. Luis Suarez – Hannibal Lecter (Silence Of The Lambs)
While Suarez has been behaving himself for the last, uh, year or so, his reputation is sealed: He’s a biter, folks. No word on whether he’s gone as far as “liver with fava beans” but his well-documented appetite for his opponents on the pitch might just be a gateway into Lecter-like activities.
3. Pat Riley – Gordon Gekko (Wall Street)
Besides having their slicked back hair and general appearance in common, they also know a thing or two about betrayal, hypocrisy, and the need for power as well. I’ll let CBS Radio’s Damon Amendolara explain more.
4. Dennis Rodman – The Joker (The Dark Knight)
Perhaps he hasn’t held an entire city hostage, and he might not even be engaged in an eternal struggle with “The Batman,” but he’s pretty crazy in his own right. Plus, the hair totally gives it away.
5. Donald Sterling – Mr. Potter (It’s A Wonderful Life)
Old, repugnant, and desperately clinging to power in their waning years is a pretty accurate description for both of these characters. This comparison may be unflattering to Mr. Potter more so than Sterling as even old man Potter didn’t resort to racism.
6. LeBron James – Snape (Harry Potter)
Ok, try and follow me on this one. You know how you spend a majority of the Harry Potter series absolutely hating Snape with a burning passion and hoping he meets an untimely and grisly end as soon as possible, and then he ends up being the good guy in the end? Well, that’s King James. Kind of. Moving on.
7. Most Of FIFA – Evil Version Of Ocean’s 11 (Ocean’s 11)
The FIFA guys lied, cheated and stole their way to amassing multi-million dollar fortunes and ridiculously lavish lifestyles on the backs of the world’s most popular sport. They truly were like an evil incarnation of Ocean’s 11
Plus, can’t you picture the FIFA guys lead by Sepp Blatter sitting around a fountain smiling from ear-to-ear after each con they pulled off? At least the less likable and much less attractive FIFA guys will likely be seeing some jail time in the near future with no chance of a sequel (or five).
Bryan Altman is, for some reason, an unabashed fan of the Rangers, Jets and Mets. If he absolutely had to pick a basketball team it would be the Knicks, but he’d gladly trade them for just one championship for either of his other three teams.